Friday, September 18, 2015

Body Shaming

Hey you, it's been a long awhile. I've been on this journey of self discovery outside of clothing and accessories so I haven't posted much. But today I decided that I have some things say...

Lately, I've been having these "morning reflection sessions" that's what I'll refer to them as because I'm not sure how else to explain it. Basically, something will come to my mind and I'll ponder it intensely. I'll wonder why I'm thinking about it and try to arrive at an explanation as to how it applies to me. This morning it was body shaming. Warning!!!! Brace yourself because I'm about to go on a rant.

For the past few months I've been trying to pin point the very moment I started picking apart my body.  When everything suddenly seemed so imperfect. I've never been one to really concentrate on imperfections. Never concerned myself with cellulite or calories. I was just me and I was genuinely happy in my body. I grew up with an excellent example. I never heard my mother talk negatively about her image. There was never any pressure to look a certain way. I grew up confident in who I  was. There was never any reason to participate in body shaming.

Then one day that all changed. I found myself joining in on these horrible body bashing conversations. It was like a light switched. Suddenly my thighs were to big. My butt, something which I've always taken a certain amount of pride in, was way too big. My stomach wasn't tight enough, my boobs weren't big enough. I could go on. But the point is, this started out as me expressing the small dissatisfaction I had with some part of my body and resulted in me hating everything about it. It became ugly. And quite frankly, depressing.

As many of you probably know my recent obsession has been crossfit. Along with this obsession has come a significant amount of growth both physically and mentally. Physically speaking, I'm in the best shape of my life. Everyday that I go to the gym I'm floored at what my body just accomplished. I've never considered myself to be athletic so this is a huge victory for me. My body has definitely changed. I discover a new muscle every day. But this physical growth brought on a new phase of body issues, a fear of becoming too muscular, too bulky, too manly. UGH! It's literally so exhausting.

Then this morning I had this thought...why do we do this self hating ritual? Where did my obsession with it come from? And how can I stop it? I decided the solution was simple. I need to stop engaging in that type of behavior. It might seem stupid but I never realized the impact my self hate could have on other people until my realizaton this morning.

To my ladies out there hating on their beautiful bodies,  stop it and here's why...

We think we're engaging in a harmless conversation about our own body struggles. How could our body dissatisfaction have any impact on anyone else? We've convinced ourselves that this type of behavior has no impact on the women who lend a listening ear. But have you stopped to really think about it? We think we're only pulling ourselves apart but we are completely unaware of the impact on other people. We're tearing eachother down one senseless comment at a time. We've all been there whether we recognize it or not. We're hating on something that's a flaw in our eyes. Of course, because we see it as a flaw everyone else in the world sees it to. Wrong! That flaw could possibly be our best attribute in the eyes of another, somethING they've have  admired about your beauty. And you're ripping it apart. All of the sudden, this harmless behavior has caused a complex for someone else. You know what I'm talking tiny person comments on how big her thighs are. Instantly the thought crosses your mind "if her thighs are big, mine are huge." One person thinks they look "fat" in a photo and the whole group hates how they look. Do you see the vicious cycle?

For me, as of lately it's been my traps. I've become so focused on them that I've forgotten how hard I've worked to earn them. I looked at them as a flaw instead of a badge of honor. And today, that's coming to an end. I encourage all of you caught up in body shaming to join me in declaring your beauty. Make a personal pledge to stop the self hate and start a journey to discovering the goddess that you are. Because we're all fucking gorgeous and that's the bottom line. (Sorry for the profanity but some situations warrant it.)

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

A New Direction.

So it’s been awhile.  Like…a long while.  There was nothing glamorous about my little break.  I didn’t spend months touring Europe or meditating to find my inner peace.  Truth be told, I became kind of disgruntled with the blogging world. As much as I love the support and encouragement that comes along with blogging, there’s also this constant need to be perfect.  It became exhausting and daunting for me.  The perfect outfit, perfect photos, perfect hair, perfect make-up.  Perfect. Perfect. PERFECT! Honestly, at the time I felt far from perfect. My blogging breakup was less than glamorous consisting of lots of make-up-less days, bad hair days, and lots of flat shoes (Oh yeah! I stopped wearing my beloved heels.  You read that correctly).  I had convinced myself that I had nothing of interest to share if I wasn’t dressing flawlessly every day. It’s almost as if I let clothing define me. Obviously, I quickly lost interest because that’s not all of who I am.   So I just stopped blogging. 

I did, however, allow myself to enjoy more of my life.  Instead of focusing on taking the perfect photo or creating the perfect setting.  I soaked in the moments.  I looked at life through my lens and not my phones.  I enjoyed the now instead of thinking about tomorrow’s post.  I didn’t even think about this blog until recently...
Over the past few days I’ve found myself thinking about a few topics and mentally writing a journal entry.  I contemplated starting a personal journal then thought how boring that seemed. No one except me gets the privilege of reading that journal. And there’s always that odd chance that someone might enjoy my randomness, even if it’s only my mom.  Then I reminded myself about my “fashion” blog.  There’s no strict guidelines forcing me to write about fashion.  There’s nothing that says I can’t blurt out my random thoughts to share with the world.  Like it or not Country Living in Heels might take a change in direction. It might become more of a hodgepodge of my random thoughts.  I hope you all continue to follow along it’s bound to be a fabulously imperfect journey. 

Monday, October 13, 2014

The Perfect Fall Accessories

Good morning Dolls,

I'm very excited to share with you a guest post from a follower of CLIH.  Kimberly has prepared some great recommendations for the perfect Fall accessories.  I wish I would've had a few of these pieces this past weekend-Enjoy!

If you haven’t made a Fall bucket list (procrastinators, unite!) grab a pumpkin spice bar, sit down, and start writing! This autumnal time of year lends itself perfectly to countless seasonal activities, traditions, and of course—delicious treats. From haunted houses to corn mazes, pumpkin patches to candy apples, inspiration abounds! Since many of these adventures take place outside, smart style choices are a must. Here are some enviable fall fashion pieces that will make even the frostiest experiences warm and fuzzy!
Scarves are synonymous with fall, and they have an incredible ability to pull an outfit together with pretty much zero. There is a scarf for every outfit you could possibly think of, and there are at least 7 different ways to wear your wrap of choice. The real win here is that scarves are incredibly functional (not just fashionable) and will help keep the chill off of your face and neck.


(Find it here!)

Gloves will undoubtedly be your best friend when you’re standing in line at a haunted corn maze, or sifting through the pumpkin patch trying to find the perfect gourd. A warm drink can only keep your hands warm for so long; after that, your mittens will be left to take care of the light work.

In lieu of wearing a hat or beanie, try opting for a headband instead. The lush fabric will keep your head and ears warm without permanently sacrificing your hairstyle. Let’s be honest; once you get hat-hair, it’s hard to make a complete recovery!

Last, but certainly not least, don’t forget to give your feet some fashionable love! Boot toppers will help keep a draft from creeping down your kicks and chilling your toes without adding the bulk of a thick sock. The best part is, there’s pretty much nothing cuter than a bit of lace peeking out of your boots!

Hopefully these little treats have inspired you to embrace fall with open arms (and fabulous fashion!). If you’ve got a cozy autumn accessory that you love, share it in the comments below!

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Wine about it


The most amazing sites.  Literally, breathe taking

The wine cellar entrance at Bully Hill...
We couldn't resist snapping a few pictures in the fields of grape vines.

@ Bully Hill Vineyards

The cuteness though...

Every stop we visited had a photo opportunity.
The only brewery we were able to visit.  They have this amazing full stout that is an amazing combination of chocolate, coffee, and mint. 

The most beautiful views...

Mmmm....the freshest concord grapes.

This past weekend, I was lucky enough to be invited to visit Keuka Lake.  It was the perfect therapy for a chaotic week.  The views were spectacular.  And the wine was delish! 
…Basically, it was the picture-perfect weekend! 

Where She Got It:  J.Crew inspired quilted coat-Walmart (here), scarf- Walmart (here), jeans-Express,  Tunic-H & M (old), Boots- DSW (old)

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

At home with CLIH

Thank you, Pinterest for the color inspirstion!
New desk accessories- TJ Max

My new accessories make me feel inspired...

A few old accessories received a facelift with new color.
New Fall wreath-Welcome!

Getting in the Fall spirit.
Home decorating is a passion I inherited from my talented mother. Growing up she was always decorating our home. I always had a perfectly decorated bedroom. But her holiday displays are always my favorite. Christmas at home is simply gorgeous!

I've caught the decorating flu from her. So lately, I've been rearranging rooms and preparing for Fall.

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

sheer obsession.



WHERE SHE GOT IT:  Belt-NY&C (Old), Dress-TJ Max

WHERE SHE GOT IT: Ballet Flats-Target (old)

WHERE SHE GOT IT: Sunnies-Target, bag-Dots (old)

I picked up this vintage inspired maxi at the opening of our very own TJ Max.  Its intended purpose was a contender for this year’s World’s Largest Disco event.  As it sat in my closest, the fonder I became of it.  Paired with this studded belt it became the perfect outfit for a little shopping with the girls.

Happy Hump Day, dolls!

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Lady in red

WHERE SHE GOT IT:  Belt-Express, Watch-Michael Kors, Bag-Kate Spade, Shoes-Kardashian Kollection at Sears

WHERE SHE GOT IT:  Pants-Express, Shirt-Target

The color of the moment for me right now is red.  In the last week, I've purchased a pair of pants, a shirt, and this fabulous handbag all in the color red.  It's bold.  It's beautiful.  It's everything to me right now.
Happy Thursday, dolls!